Thoughts on clams, road construction, the usefulness of batteries, and how I have a magic radio

So I've been having these thoughts bouncing around in my head all day (although some of them happened on the drive home) and I need to write them down before I stop being loopy and forget them.

Clams: Why the crap are they so happy? Drugs perhaps? I think that's the only way, because what to they really have to be happy about? Someone should tell them but I can't be the one because A) the only clams I have access to would probably be the ones at Sizzler or something and they already know life sucks and B) I'd hate to be the one to burst their bubble of happiness.

Road Construction: Effing potholes on the stupid freeway! Did I already tell you guys how I got a flat tire on my way to work last week because I hit a pothole? And it was balls cold outside and no, I didn't have my coat because I'm an idiot sometimes. But an optimistic idiot! Driving home today I was driving half in the slow lane and half in the not-so-slow lane before my exit because the slow lane is actually a pothole ridden DEATH TRAP! Also, people who drive 50 mph in the fast lane suck.

Batteries: Useful for powering things and that's it right? WRONG! You can throw them at people to see if they're dead.

Magic Radio: Driving home, trying to aviod the slow lane, had just called my *bleh* boyfriend (maybe I'll explain someday) to say we could now play. He didn't answer. So I'm driving and come to the conclusion that if I find the song that is my ringtone on the radio, it will make my phone ring and it will be him. After ten minutes of fruitlessly searching through radio stations I found the song, and not two seconds later MY PHONE STARTED RINGING! And it was him! Like I said. My radio is magic and I'll try to use it's powers for limites evil and mostly good.

That is all. I'm going to go and try to have an adventure.

Paint Euphoria

First off. I started writing the title and when I finished the word it when all crazy and changed into a language that I had no idea what it was! Did you know there's a setting that lets you write in Malayalam? I'm totally serious that's what it was set as. But I fixed it so no worries!

Ok, so I've moved back in with my parents for a number of reasons, but reason numero uno is...it's cheap. Megan and I moved all last weekend and it was a pain (as all college students know because we move a lot! Or at least I did...was that abnormal?) But we finally got all our junk over here and guess what! I get an actual room! All to myself! So of course I'm going to paint it.

I've had this idea for a while that I've wanted to do but haven't been able to, so I was pretty excited about finally being able to do it. Let me see if I can describe it first before you look at the pictures. I wanted to do a sunset along one wall with the silhouette of a city. I decided to do Rome because A.) I've always wanted to go there and B.) It's a bitchin skyline.

I'm now going to walk you through the process.

This is what my room looked like to start out with:

Not bad, just a nice relaxing light green. After painting it looked like this:

Looks a bit like an explosion right? Ok I'm going to interrupt myself with a story.

When I was painting my room I had to shut the door so I could get the wall on the other side of it. I then forgot to open the door again. Three hours later I'd painted this awesomeness and I was very very loopy. I was loopy the next day too when I was at my friend Scott's homecoming. This woman stood up after Scott to speak and started off by saying that her name was Susan Kay Somethingorother but went by Kay and this here was her husband Gary. At that point I leaned over to Naya and whispered "He goes by Gary" I seriously thought that was so hilarious that when I was telling it to some friends after sacrament I was doubled over, reduced to tears. If that isn't paint euphoria I don't know what is. Around Sunday night I was over my fit of giggles.

Moving on! I had Megan sketch me the skyline of Rome on some poster board which I cut out then taped to the wall:

In an effort to not get high off of the paint fumes again (there's only so much the brain can take in a 72 hour period right? For example, in that last sentence alone I had to retype five words two or three times because I kept on misspelling them.) I tied a scarf around my face. I don't think it was very successful.

But here is the finished product!

Pretty sweet huh? Now I just need to organize my room and unpack! Woot! But for now I'm going to bed because I feel a little light headed...

Twenty Ten

So I'm sitting here listening to hate music and compiling my mix for snowboarding (when I eventually get to snowboarding this winter I want to be prepared with the appropriate soundtrack) and thinking about how much has happened this last year. It's crazy to think how much can change in that amount of time. I'm just going to share with you some of the things I mean.

January - Giulia left the ranks of the YUC club, the second of the four girls my age to get married. Unfortunately, I was unable to attend her wedding because I had some problems with some of my offshore banking accounts...uhhh...I mean I was on a cruise with my family to the Cayman Islands. (That trip was the first time I'd been on a plane, but I can't really count it as happening in the last year because we left on like the 27th of December) I moved into the Green house with Kylee and JB two of my best friends who I really miss living with somedays because we were the chillest roommates ever.

February - I think it was sometime in February that I became friends with Guido (Yes, I call him Guido. No, that's not his real name.) He'll be mentioned again later. Rugby 7's was this month! Oh man that trip was epic! Buff men covered in dirt and grass stains...Rawr.

March - I continued to be sick of school and sucking at it. But on the plus side I did lots of random things and had lots of fun with my awesome friends. Remember trying to light our popsicle stick boats on fire and failing miserably? Or did we do that in April...Kaylyn left for her mission, and I'm so freakin proud of her for going!

April - Finals! I'm fairly positive I failed all of my classes...except nutrition. I think I got a D in that one. This was when I got a job with Pinnacle Security as a field office manager and would be moving out to Buffalo, New York for the summer. Guido is the one who told me about this job and he's going out to New York as well. This is also the month that we had our epic ninja battle in Adam's Park! Poor Shannon, her teammates just stood back and watched as we subjected her to the beating of her life. Grizzly tryouts were this month as well and I got my first set of stitches ever!

May - I moved to New York. There were moments of complete happiness, but it was mostly just a black hole of depression.

June - The office I was working in wasn't making sales so I went home. I was also miserable so I came home. I started going to the singles ward in American Fork, the first singles ward that I've actually enjoyed going to. Jess left for Iraq at the end of this month.


July - Mexico trip and I drove down with Megan, Naya and Sabey. Despite the fact that it was freezing the entire time and we ended up leaving early so we could get back to Utah and the sun, it was pretty fun. The funnest part was stopping in Vegas on the way home and going to the Stratosphere. Yes, it took us like two hours to get up to the ride and when we were RIGHT THERE it broke down. But we had our embarrassing dance party on the way down that still makes me giggle when I think about it and then there was the Filipino lady who wasn't going to refund Naya so Megan was preparing to start smacking her down (no worries, Naya got the full refund and no Filipinos were hurt). I moved to Pleasant Grove with Megan to help her out with Sabey while Jess is in Iraq. The Young Family reunion was up at Bear Lake this year and Erin and I slept in an 8-man tent by ourselves. This is where the "Sometimes We Wear Pants Club" and the "Sometimes We Don't Wear Pants Club" were born.

August - Finally I found a job! It's working with Provo City as a referee for youth soccer. I LOVED this job!

September - My soccer job ends, and I get another job at the Covey Center for the Arts in Provo as a stage hand. I didn't know anything about lighting/sound/other stage things so I was learning new stuff everyday. I love it. This is also when I came to the decision to serve a mission. Tucker left for his mission and I am terrible at writing him.


October - I finally stop crying over Guido. Sure, I still felt lonely 75% of the time and missed him like crazy, but I was starting to be genuinely happy again instead of just having to fake it.

November - Finally am able to start my mission papers and finish them in one sitting. I just need to go to a doctor to sign a note. I worked a ridiculous amount of time this month, one week I clocked in 50 hours. The next week I worked like 60.



December -21st Birthday. Some friends came down and took me on a zombie hunt, after which they gave me my present. Pretty much I have the coolest friends in the world! Erin got engaged, leaving me to sleep in the 8-man tent at the family reunions by myself. Maybe I can convince Naya and some of the other younger Young cousins to join me?

This is mostly just me writing everything that is coming to my mind, so I don't know if it even makes any sense or if you can see how much I've changed in the last year. I feel like I've grown up so much and my priorities now are so incredibly different than they were just a year ago. My future isn't any clearer though. If anything, it's even hazier, which is fine. It's ok that I don't have everything in life figured out, I'm still young, and things are going to get harder before they get easy. But that's life and growing up isn't it? Just as long as I make sure that certain things are always constant then I really have nothing to worry or complain about. This was kind of a sadish post I feel, it actually was a really good year for me, filled with great friends and great family.

What's Lost

So I've been feeling a little....blah...lately. Like I'm missing something in life. It went away when I started working a lot, but then it came back. It went away when I started my mission papers, but then it came back. It goes away when I am hanging out with friends, but then is comes back. It always comes back, and I couldn't figure out what it was that was making me feel so...blah...

Well I was on Facebook today when I read something that made me realize what it is! The following quote is said in reference to defending yourself from someone who has a knife.

"Look, you are going to get cut. Who cares? Beat the $*@& out of them and pick the knife up off the ground for the disarm; and bleed all over them in the process. Remember, they don't expect you to punch them in the face. When you are attacking someone with a knife and you suddenly get punched in the face, that ruins your day." -Joseph Gleed

I miss Krav Maga! I miss learning new ways to beat the crap out of people who are just asking for it! But I mostly miss being with people who are just as violent as I am and have a similar morbid sense of humor. I need a violence outlet, because without it I've become dead inside. All this pent up anger is killing all of my other emotions and then petering out until there's nothing left. This is a problem that is in need of remedy. And soon.

At Your Expense

I try and go play soccer on Thursdays with some people I've recently met. It's kind of a hit or miss because I work so much, but last Thursday I was able to make it. You know those days where it seems that everything is a joke at your expense? Well....

There I was! Pulling into the parking lot of the BYU men's rugby pitch (this is where we usually play because one of the guys has access to turn the lights on or something like that) ready to play some soccer. I had brought my good friend Erika to play with us. Well it looked like a men's rugby match had just finished because there were a plethora of men in short shorts and no shirts walking to their cars. Is it not natural that I would admire this feast for the eyes that had been laid before me? So I was drooling over and objectifying these ruggers while pulling into my parking space when OUT OF NOWHERE jumps this fence! Luckily, I have mad ninja skills and didn't hit it too hard. Really, you'd think by now that fences had learned not to jump out in front of moving vehicles...

Needless to say (but I'm going to say it anyway) the people who saw me/heard me run into this fence had themselves a good laugh. Including my good friend Erika. I sat there in my car, holding my head in shame and didn't even want to get out to check on my car until everyone had left. After about two minutes of shameful head hanging and embarrassed blushing (that's right, blushing!) I heard a knock on the driver side window. It was one of the rugby players. I was sure he was here to mock me to my face and I was fully prepared to disembowel him. No, I didn't have a knife on me. I was going to use my bare hands of course! Amateurs. I rolled down my window, not letting any sign of this poor unfortunate's doom show on my face.

"You guys ok?" He asked. Uhhhhhh....ok I guess I don't have to disembowel him. We assured him we were fine, made some polite chit chat and he left. Who knew there were rugby players out there who aren't obnoxious schmucks all the time?

The night continued as a big joke at my expense. Whenever I touched the soccer ball it had some sort of negative magnetism to the goal, pwned by one of my own teammates and was thrown into a dumpster (but it's ok, it was just full of sand).

So yeah, every time I turned around I was getting laughed at or picked on for something or other. It could have been embarrassing and miserable, but it was too funny for me not to laugh at myself. Even ninjas have their off days I guess.

Mo the Hermit

It's a Friday night and I'm home alone. What do I do? Why I call up all my homies and say, "What's crackin' yo? We should go catch a flick or cause mischief or something..."

That was a lie. I go get some movies, a pizza, and some Mt Dew and settle in for a night of solitary splurging. Half a pizza later I'm thinking that was not such a good idea, because that hot 'n' ready pizza did not agree with me.

I'm ok with being by myself, I really am. Sure, you feel a little ridiculous for laughing so hysterically at a movie when you're by yourself, but nobody is there to mock you. And I usually laugh harder because I think that me laughing this hard by myself is kind of funny, don't you?

I think that having time by yourself is healthy. This last year I was constantly around people, which came back and kicked me in the pants this summer. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends and I wouldn't trade any of our crazy random adventures for anything. I miss them like crazy. But I can't help but think that if I'd taken some time to be by myself I wouldn't have been so miserable in New York, or in Lehi.

Moral of the story? Be alone sometimes! No, you don't necessarily have to eat lousy pizza in order to do it. I would recommend a hike or some equally healthy option, anything to get some of that alone time to figure out who you are. Heaven AND Hell both know I've had plenty of time this summer to do that, and I didn't necessarily like who I saw.

I've learned a lot about myself recently and I like to think that I've been able to use that knowledge to be a better, more confident person. My faith is stronger, I'm making new friends down here and I have two jobs, one of which I actually enjoy!

I had no intention of going to spiritual side of things here, but here goes. I do have a testimony of Christ's love for us, I've felt that love more in these past few months than I have in my entire life. Even in your darkest hours, you're never alone and he's just waiting for us to reach out for him. He loves us more than we'll ever know or even be able to comprehend and I don't acknowledge him nearly as often as I should. He's got my back and I know he's got yours as well. Talk to him, I know he listens.

The Fun Way to Run

So I've been in Mexico for a few days with some of my family. Megan and I went running on the beach yesterday. I know, I know. Running sucks right? Right! But that's only because you've been doing it wrong! Don't worry, I was making the same mistake you were and now I'm here to tell you how to fix it.

So there I was! Running down the beach with Megan. We'd run to the pier and had just finished stretching and were heading back. Just running la la la when KNIFE ATTACK! Well ok, it was just headlock attack but it caught Megan off guard and she had to think about the defense for a second. She got out of it and we continued our run. A few more feet along and KNIFE ATTACK! Megan knife attacked me, I defended and countered by kneeing her in the face a few times. We continued to do this the whole way back and when we were done I wasn't really all that tired! I had too much adrenaline in my system. So there you go. If you find you have to do the chore that running is, find a buddy and randomly attack each other.